What your buyer needs to hear

Working on Ikeuchi's campaigns, we found that the way we explained the product needed to change quite a bit between segments.

For printed circuit board manufacturers, we were writing about scrap and damaged components backing up at the rework station. For paint shops, we were writing about paint defects and contamination rework.

Ikeuchi sells humidification systems, so we had to explain why adding moisture to the air made sense for each buyer.

You can use the same process for your next sequence: start with what buyers say on calls, then use it to explain the offer.

Everything comes back to solving a specific problem for a specific person in a specific way.

If you're not being specific, no one's going to care.

Circuit boards: scrap, rework and moisture

In the circuit board campaign, the language included “scrap rate” and “rework station backlog.” Those describe what the problem means to someone dealing with damaged boards on an assembly floor.

We also had a concern to address: “Can't mist near the line.”

If we're adding moisture near circuit boards, we need to answer that concern. The buyer needs to know whether our solution could damage the thing they're trying to protect.

So the copy used “non-wetting humidification” and explained what that meant for their boards: add moisture to the air without getting them wet.

Then we offered a way to examine it in their own space:

“We'll set up a trial area so you can see the before and after.”

Paint shops: defects and contamination

The paint-shop copy opened with a different question:

“do you guys still experience dust contaminations and fisheyes in your paint booths?”

Here, we were talking about paint defects. The email explained the dry-fog offer in terms of dust getting onto panels while they were being painted.

Later in the sequence, we asked to reach whoever was dealing with “the daily headache of fisheyes and contamination rework.”

That email was aimed at the person responsible for paint quality or production.

How to find the words for your next sequence

We checked what belonged in these emails against what our reps heard on calls, sales transcripts, and complaints in relevant Reddit forums.

1. Talk to the people taking the calls

If you're doing this for your own company, start with the people having the conversations.

Ask your reps what keeps coming up when they explain the offer. Have them talk you through the objection, what the buyer was worried about, and what they said in response.

You want the details they remember from actually being there.

2. Read the transcripts and buyer complaints

Then go back through the transcripts. Look for the way buyers describe the problem before your salesperson introduces their own wording.

You're not a doctor, okay? You're ultimately a salesperson, so you need to listen to how they're feeling and let them tell you what's wrong, and then use that language.

For the circuit board offer, you'd be looking for whether they're talking about scrap, rework, or moisture near the line.

Use relevant Reddit discussions to find more of that language. Save the complaint with its context so you don't put a paint-shop concern into an email about circuit boards.

3. Answer the objections you keep hearing

When an objection keeps appearing, check whether the product genuinely addresses it. If it does, explain that in the email before asking the next buyer to consider a trial.

4. Read it out loud, then check it with your reps

Then read the email out loud.

It needs to sound like you're talking to someone at a bar. Repeating the buyer's words matters, but forcing terminology into a sentence makes the offer harder to follow.

Before your next sequence goes out, give it to the person who took those calls. Ask whether it describes the problem the buyer brought up and answers their concern.

Want more help with the copy?

Watch my free Cold Email Copywriting Made Simple video for more on what to write in your next campaign.

- Mitch

P.S. Something I've been thinking about: I like hiring people who take ownership but hate doing things the hard way. That's what I mean by a lazy general - someone who'll automate the boring part because they still feel responsible for getting it done. Churchill is the example I use, someone who worked hard and still wanted a life outside of work.